If You Can’t Afford Private School, Your Child’s Future is at Risk (REALITY)

Mama Kemi used to be my hair stylist before everything changed. She had this daughter, Funmi, who was so sharp eh… this girl could solve mathematics like she was born with calculator for brain. Every time I went to make my hair, Mama Kemi would brag about how Funmi was always number one in her class at Community Primary School, Ikeja. “My daughter is going to be a doctor,” she would say with so much pride.

Fast forward to 2019. I met Mama Kemi at the market looking completely different… tired, stressed, older. When I asked about Funmi, her face just changed. “Sister, that girl is brilliant o, but these private school children have scattered her confidence finish. She wrote JAMB four times before she could get admission to study Biology Education instead of Medicine. All because of English and general paper.” That conversation broke my heart and opened my eyes to something we don’t like to talk about.

The Shocking Reality I Witnessed Myself

Two years ago, I was invited to judge a debate competition between five schools in Lagos. Three private schools, two public schools. The topic was simple: “Technology is more harmful than beneficial to teenagers.” What I saw that day still haunts me.

The public school students had brilliant ideas… their arguments were solid, their logic was sharp. But when they stood up to speak, everything fell apart. One boy kept saying “the technology has make the children to…” instead of “technology has made children…” Another girl had fantastic points but couldn’t express them confidently in English. Meanwhile, the private school kids were speaking like news anchors, using big words, proper grammar, and had this confidence that filled the whole auditorium.

The most painful part? After the competition, I overheard one of the private school students tell his friend, “Those public school kids don’t even know how to speak English properly.” That comment made me realize something… it’s not just about education anymore. It’s about class, confidence, and how society treats you based on how you sound.

What Nobody Tells You About the English Wahala

Here’s what will shock you… I know a man who graduated with First Class in Engineering from University of Lagos, but he couldn’t get jobs in multinational companies because his spoken English was “too local.” Meanwhile, his course mate who had Second Class Lower but attended private school from primary to secondary got hired immediately at Shell.

The companies didn’t even look at their GPAs during the interview. They just listened to how they spoke and made their decisions. The private school graduate could discuss current affairs confidently, crack jokes in proper English, and relate with the expatriate managers easily. My UNILAG first class friend kept mixing Yoruba with English and seemed intimidated during the interview.

This is the reality our children will face. In Nigeria, your accent and command of English will sometimes matter more than your actual intelligence or qualifications. It’s not fair, but it’s true.

The Confidence Crisis That Breaks My Heart

You know what hurts the most? Watching brilliant public school children shrink in the presence of their private school peers. I’ve seen it happen too many times. These children start believing they’re not smart enough, not good enough, not worthy of certain opportunities.

My friend’s son, David, was like this. Brilliant in mathematics and sciences, but whenever he met children from expensive schools, he would become quiet and withdrawn. He started believing he was “local” and “bush.” His mother had to spend three years rebuilding his confidence while simultaneously improving his English through private lessons.

The psychological damage of educational inequality is real. Some children never recover from feeling “less than” their peers, even when they’re actually more intelligent.

The Hidden Costs Nobody Calculates

When people talk about private versus public school, they only consider school fees. But let me break down what my sister-in-law spent trying to “upgrade” her son after six years of public primary school:

Private English lessons: ₦15,000 monthly for two years = ₦360,000 Computer training: ₦50,000 Extra mathematics classes: ₦10,000 monthly for 18 months = ₦180,000 Pronunciation and public speaking classes: ₦80,000 JAMB coaching: ₦45,000 per session, three sessions = ₦135,000

Total: Over ₦850,000… and this was five years ago! She spent almost a million naira trying to fix what good early education could have prevented. Now tell me, which one is more expensive?

But I’ve Seen Miracles Happen

Don’t think I’m completely hopeless about public schools. I’ve seen parents who couldn’t afford private school fees but were determined to give their children quality education at home.

Aunty Bisi, our former neighbor, had three children in public schools but she turned her sitting room into a mini-library every evening. She bought educational CDs, made her children watch BBC and CNN news daily, and corrected their English religiously. She even invited a retired teacher to come teach them proper English twice a week for ₦5,000 monthly.

Today, all three of her children are professionals abroad. The eldest is a software engineer in Canada, the second is a nurse in the UK, and the youngest is studying Medicine at UI. When I asked her secret, she said, “I couldn’t afford private school fees, but I could afford to be intentional about their education.”

The Strategy That Actually Works

If you must keep your child in public school, here’s what you absolutely must do… and I’m speaking from watching families who succeeded:

Create an English-speaking environment at home. Even if your English isn’t perfect, make an effort. Watch English movies together, discuss current events, and encourage them to express their thoughts in English daily.

Invest in weekend classes for English and Mathematics. Find good tutorial centers that focus on language development and problem-solving skills.

Buy them access to online learning platforms like Khan Academy, Coursera, or even YouTube educational channels. Teach them to learn independently.

Expose them to different environments. Take them to book exhibitions, science fairs, museums, and events where they can interact with children from various backgrounds.

Most importantly, never let them feel inferior because of their school. Build their confidence while improving their skills.

The Brutal Truth About Opportunities

I won’t lie to you… some doors will be harder to open for your child if they don’t have that private school foundation. Scholarship opportunities, international exchange programs, premium university admissions, and top-tier job interviews often favor students with certain educational backgrounds.

But here’s what I’ve learned from successful parents who beat the odds: your child’s future isn’t determined by their school alone, but by how intentional you are about supplementing their education.

The playing field isn’t level, but it’s not completely impossible to navigate. You just need to be ten times more strategic, dedicated, and creative about building your child’s future.

Your child’s success will ultimately depend on the total investment you make in their development, not just the school name on their certificate.