How To Learn Submission To Your Husband As A Wife In Marriage

Let’s be honest, the word submission has caused plenty wahala in Nigerian homes. Some people hear it and immediately think, “So you want me to become a slave?” Others hear it and start quoting Bible verses without explaining what it really means in real life. But the truth is… submission is not oppression. And if you get it right, your marriage will be sweeter than honey.

Submission is not stupidity

Ephesians 5:22 says, “Wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands, as unto the Lord.” But please, note that it didn’t say submit to wickedness or foolishness. Submission is simply respect, trust, and willingness to follow his leadership. It doesn’t mean you should lose your voice. It doesn’t mean you can’t share your ideas. A wise husband knows his wife is his helper, not his housemaid.

Think about it this way: in football, even the best strikers still listen to the coach’s instructions. That’s not weakness… it’s teamwork.

Start with respect in your words to your husband

Some women pray for a loving home but talk to their husbands as if they are scolding a small boy. My sister, respect shows first in your mouth. Even when you disagree, you can still correct him respectfully. Instead of shouting “You don’t know anything!”, you can calmly say, “Babe, I think we should also consider this option…” Small change in tone can prevent big quarrels.

Submission to your husband is tested in small things

Sometimes it’s not about the big decisions. It’s in little things like allowing him choose what to eat once in a while, asking his opinion before making plans, or even letting him drive in peace without shouting “slow down” every two minutes. Those small actions show that you trust him. And funny enough, men notice it more than you think.

Don’t confuse submission with silence

Submission is not keeping quiet when you see danger. If your husband wants to invest all your savings into one suspicious “quick money” scheme, it is wisdom to speak up. Submission is not watching him walk into fire and clapping. A good wife supports, advises, and even prays over her husband’s decisions. But she does it with humility, not nagging.

Prayer makes submission easier to your husband

Let me not lie to you, submission is not always easy. Especially if your husband has his stubborn moments. But prayer softens both your heart and his. When you pray, you’ll find yourself calmer, less argumentative, and more willing to follow his lead. And when you pray for him, God himself will touch his heart to love and value you more.

Let me round up with this small advice for you… submission is not about losing your identity, it’s about building a partnership where both of you win. When you honor your husband, you’re also honoring God. And in the long run, you’ll see that respect and love go hand in hand.